What If Pests Celebrated Valentine’s Day?

Happy Valentine’s Day from Green Pest Services! We hope you have a great day full of love and time spent with loved ones, or with a much-needed self care day. There are many ways to spend this day that don’t have to involve the typical commercialism associated with a so-called “greeting card holiday.” In fact, if many of our common pests had the opportunity to spend this holiday in similar ways to people, we feel that they would have their own traditions that makes today special for them. Let’s explore the possibilities of pests celebrating Valentine’s Day in their own unique ways in the latest installment of our fictional-based series that makes pests much more appealing than they are in reality.

Bake Valentine’s Treats – Ants

Many would agree that the best part of Valentine’s Day is the sheer amount of sugary treats that are gifted at school, work, and home. Whether it’s a box of chocolates with fillings that remain a mystery until bitten into, a plate of heart-shaped cookies that your baking-loving friend created, or a box of those chalky conversation hearts that you could probably use to draw on the sidewalk, this is definitely a holiday for the sweet-toothed people. Another being that has a massive sugar craving is the ant, especially when the colony population is steadily growing. Sugar gives ants the reliable energy boost they need in order to complete the unending list of tasks they have daily to keep the colony going, which is why it is common to see ants drawn to any sugary particles. If they could celebrate Valentine’s Day like us, ants would spend most of the day in their kitchen. They would steadily work through all of their saved baking recipes and make enough to feed a small army. The ants would then spend the rest of the day hand-delivering their creations to their (many) friends and family, who all know to expect these treats to be incredibly sugary. Ants would love any treat they produce, but their top favorites would have to be the red velvet cupcakes with honey frosting and the strawberry cheesecake cookies with white chocolate chips, all predictably baked into heart-shapes.

Pass Out Valentines – Fireflies

Fireflies are much more common out in the fields on summer evenings than right now, but that is just because they thrive in warm, humid weather. The famous lights naturally built into the anatomy of these insects are their form of communication with one another. Their bioluminescence is made possible with certain organs in fireflies’ bodies that utilize their oxygen flow and natural chemicals to flash their lights at certain speeds. They are mostly used for finding mates around dusk, but fireflies also use their lights to ward off enemies and find their own species. If Valentine’s Day had to be known for one tradition, it would definitely be trading store-bought greeting cards or those pre-made, foldable Valentines with people. Fireflies would be all for this activity, and would make their own Valentines to give to everyone they know. They would use every piece of red and pink construction paper they have in their collection to craft the best Valentine’s Day puns ever on them. The fireflies would write a short but sweet message in each card, decorate them with a bunch of heart stickers, and then attach a Valentine’s candy to the outside. Even though the fireflies aren’t in school anymore, they would get a kick out of distributing these cards to their loved ones, neighbors, and coworkers, all of whom appreciate the fact that the fireflies always know just what to say.

Give Flowers – Honeybees

Flower bouquets are a wonderful gift to receive any time of year, but Valentine’s Day is just one of those days where it is expected to see these natural gifts everywhere. Roses are the standard in many households, but it is even more special to receive favorite flowers of a different variety. If one pest knows anything about the importance of flowers, it would be the honeybee. These insects work steadily at their specific tasks in the honey-production process. The foragers will gather the nectar and pollen from flowers of many varieties, then bring it all back to the hive for the workers to manufacture into honey within the honeycombs. But even bees have their flower preferences, as the flowers they visit completely depend on the bee species and the length of their tongues compared to the build of the flower. Honeybees tend to visit less tubular-shaped flowers due to their short tongues and small bodies. But on Valentine’s Day, they would gather flowers of all shapes and sizes to give to their loved ones. The dedicated honeybees would retrieve flowers individually from their gardens, then create their own bouquets and wrap them in paper tied with a special Valentine’s Day ribbon. The bee’s recipients would love the beautiful arrangements of daisies, sunflowers, and snapdragons, among many other popular varieties. But no red roses for these insects: bees can’t see the color red!

Host a Game Night – Moths

Moths are a notable insect of the night, but their fixation on artificial lights is not the act of these insects scouting out a potential career as an electrician. Moths like to keep the brightest and largest light source above them at all times as their method of navigation. Ideally, this is the moon. But since moths are so small and do not fly above the atmosphere, they can mistake porch lights and stadium lights for the best light source. Moths are typically at their best when the sun goes down, so their favorite Valentine’s activity would be playing games with their loved ones after most people have finished dinner. The moths would put out some nice refreshments for their friends and family, but their main focus would be on the games. They would retrieve all of the board games from the back of the hall closet, and let their guests make their choices. The group might start easy with Life and Catchphrase, still enjoying each other’s company. But, inevitably, someone would pull out the old Monopoly box with the creased corners, and only the moths with the most dedication would play the game in its entirety and celebrate the victor about five hours later. 

Go Out to a Nice Dinner – Rats

If your Valentine’s plans involve taking your loved ones out to a great dinner, we hope you looked into the reservations situation before visiting the restaurant. Nothing kills the Valentine’s excitement quite like being turned away from a nice restaurant because they are completely booked for the day. Rats also understand the importance of a good meal, but their standards for food are incredibly lower than ours. These pests are omnivores and will eat anything they find that they don’t detect poison on, which is a wide range of items to choose from. They ideally prefer organic items and meats, but urban rats also enjoy trash and cellulose-based materials. However, if rats could have the opportunity to choose their own feast, they would likely raise their standards to a nicer dinner for a day like today. Rats would go to a nice restaurant – local or a chain, it doesn’t matter to them – and treat their favorite people to the best dinner ever. These rodents like to eat a combination of foods and materials, so they would not hesitate to enjoy every bite of their meal. The free bread, a shared appetizer, a starter salad, a tender steak and delicious potatoes, ending with a slice of chocolate cake for dessert, would all be enjoyed by the rats on their night out. And, since rats are scavengers, they would order another plate to-go just so they can have another taste of the good life with the leftovers tomorrow. 

Have a “Pal-entine’s Day” Party – Termites

Termites belong to a group of insects deemed “eusocial” insects, which simply means they live in a colony where each insect has a job and they are all produced from the queen. These pests have three main castes (swarmers, workers, and soldiers) that each have their own specialized tasks, and with hundreds of thousands in a healthy colony, termites definitely don’t have to worry about being lonely. But most of them are incapable of reproducing, so pairing up with a mate is not a job for anyone besides a few swarmers and the queen. Similarly, Valentine’s Day can be special for everyone, regardless of the relationship statuses. “Gal-entine’s Day” has risen in popularity over the years as a way for girls who are friends to celebrate the day together, and “Pal-entine’s Day” can be a party for all friends to enjoy together. Termites would love this tradition, and would throw the biggest “Pal-entine’s Day” party ever. They would have about ten boxes of pizza too many, but you can never be too careful when hungry termites are involved. The insects would spend the day eating lots of pizza, giving each other handmade cards, and decorating cupcakes that they will devour immediately. It may be a holiday party, but you can bet your bottom dollar that termites will always keep themselves busy.

Provide Reliable Pest Control Services – Green

Pest control does not seem like a very appealing Valentine’s Day activity, but the end result of our services is a gift that keeps on giving. Our knowledgeable technicians treat to solve pest problems as efficiently as possible, and we will treat pests in every life stage, from the eggs to the adults. At Green, we only use eco-friendly pest treatments that we guarantee will kill pests without the harmful chemicals that traditional pesticides use. Our treatment plans are personalized to fit every client’s property layout, pest problems, and personal preferences. Contact us for a free quote and to learn how Green will ensure that the only bug causing problems for you today is the love bug. 

Citations

Ford, D. (2019, July 23). How fireflies glow – and what signals they’re sending. NC State University. Available at https://news.ncsu.edu/2019/07/how-fireflies-glow-and-what-signals-theyre-sending/ (Accessed on January 20, 2023).